Queen of the Heavens Page 7
After a while, Pentu took from his sack a polished stone scarab with hieroglyphs etched onto its underside and handed it to me.
“Copy the proverb five times, and be attentive to your posture as you do so,” he commanded.
I read the words silently: Happiness for the soul lies not in the external worlds, for they will vanish. To find true happiness, look to the eternal within yourself.
After copying the proverb as instructed, I tried to hand the scarab back to Pentu.
“Keep it, Tuya,” he said. “It is my gift to you. I etched the hieroglyphs into it myself.”
“Thank you,” I said to the old scribe, amazed he would present me with a gift of any sort. “You are most gracious. I will cherish the scarab.”
“Don’t cherish the scarab. Cherish the words. Should you ever find life in the royal palaces to be not as you expected, find comfort in them.”
Pentu rose. “Keep practicing your hieroglyphs, lest you forget what I taught you,” he said, then began walking toward the gate. After some steps he turned toward me. “Oh, yes, one last thing. I did not want to teach you at first because you were a girl and I assumed you would not be able to learn. I was wrong, Tuya. You were a good student… even better than your father.”
My heart jumped with surprise at Pentu’s comment. I wished to run to the old man and embrace him, but I did not for I knew he would be embarrassed. A tear ran down my cheek. “I’ll miss you, Pentu,” I shouted as the scribe passed through the gate, his external form vanishing from my life.
The following day, Maya came to sit with me by the lotus pond.
“I don’t want us to part, Maya,” I said. “I’ve learned so much from you.”
“I’ve learned much from you as well,” she replied. “Our time together has been a joy for me.”
“Come with me to Thebes. I’m sure Ramesses and Sety would allow it.”
“No, Tuya,” Maya said as she placed her hand on mine. “My life is in Memphis, at the temple.”
“But I need you to teach me more.”
Maya smiled her gentle smile. “I have taught you all I can, but others will teach you, and before long you’ll find that you are the teacher.”
“You’ve been more than a teacher. You’ve been a friend. I can talk to you in ways I could never talk to Mother. In whom can I confide now?”
“There will be others, and Isis dwells within you and offers guidance that I cannot. You must also learn to keep your own counsel, Tuya.”
Maya gave me an item she had brought with her.
“Here. This is for you,” she said.
I unwrapped the linen surrounding it and found a stone statue of the ibis-headed Thoth.
“Seek guidance from Thoth,” Maya instructed. “I have helped to give you knowledge, but it is Thoth who transforms knowledge into wisdom.”
I held the statue next to my breasts and began to cry. Maya took me in her arms and held me against her breasts.
“I’m frightened, Maya.”
“Of course you’re frightened. You’re to become the wife of a powerful man and perhaps someday the Great Royal Wife. You will face many challenges.”
“Am I capable of meeting them?”
“Yes, Tuya. Isis would not have chosen to dwell within you if you were not. When you’re troubled and full of fear, remember you are a part of the Divine Pageant. Bring forth your love and the fear will vanish.”
“I’m not always frightened,” I said, wiping away my tears. “Most of the time I’m confident, and excited about the future. It’s times like this, when I see my former life vanishing before me that fear overwhelms me.”
“Our lives vanish continually,” Maya said. “No sooner does the future arrive than it becomes the past. Live in the present moment, my dear, for everything else is but an illusion.”
“How do I do that, Maya?”
“There are many ways. One is through dance. Get your sistrum, Tuya, and we will dance together one last time.”
I ran to my room and got the instrument my teacher had given me the day we first met. As I shook the sistrum, the two of us twirled through the garden to its rhythm. Soon, energy began to rise within me and I felt my heart center open. Faster and faster we twirled as my love poured forth into the Cosmos, and the love of the Cosmos poured into me. I thought of neither the past nor the future, but only the present as I dwelt in bliss and joy.
Maya and I danced together to the garden gate and paused for a moment, but only for a moment, to embrace. My teacher continued dancing, through the gate and down the path a ways. She smiled at me, then walked away.
I watched Maya until she turned a corner and disappeared behind a stand of trees. I danced back across the garden, picked up the statue of Thoth, went to my room and cried before the statue well into the night. The tears were ones of sadness, but also of joy that the Neters had blessed me by allowing Maya to touch my life.
The next morning, Mother, Father and I left soon after sunrise for the palace boat. Servants led two donkeys that carried our belongings and we followed behind on foot, with Father clutching tightly a wooden box containing the gold of my dowry.
We walked past the yew tree under which Maya and I had spent so many hours, and the corner of the garden where Pentu had instructed me. So much had happened in this garden and inside my house. Maya had taught me of the gods and goddesses and had shown me her love. Pentu had given me knowledge of writing that few women possessed. I had journeyed to the realm of the Neters and later become a petal in the Flower of Life as Isis entered me.
As I passed through the garden gate, a portal closed that I could never pass through again. I was leaving a life I had loved so much, and I could not be certain where the future would lead.
I must live in the present moment, as Maya told me to do, I thought. All else is but an illusion.
As I walked down the path to the river and my voyage to a new life my stomach churned, for living in the present moment is not an easy thing to do.
IX
The boat that would take us up the Nile was moored at a quay well north of the palace. Shaped like a crescent moon, it stretched thirty paces at least. A man taller than Father but about the same age greeted us as we walked across a plank and stepped on board.
“Welcome,” he said. “I’m Addaya the Captain. I’m told I must get you to Thebes within twenty days.”
“Yes,” Father replied. “The Pharaoh has graced us with an invitation to his great celebration.”
“Our daughter has been chosen by the Vizier Ramesses to be the wife of his son Sety,” Mother interjected, not trying in the least to hide her pride. “We’re accompanying Tuya to her new household.”
The Captain smiled at me. “Sety is a fortunate man to have such a charming wife. I’ll get you to Thebes by the day of the celebration. If the winds don’t cooperate, twenty oarsmen will enable us to make good time.”
“When do we depart?” Father asked.
“Soon,” the Captain answered. “We still have some provisions to load, including goats and geese so we can enjoy fresh milk and foul.” He pointed to a large cabin at the back of the boat. “Make yourself at home. My men will bring your belongings on board.”
Father pulled open bright red draperies and led the way into our living quarters, lavishly appointed with colorful cushions, linen wall coverings, and flawless woodwork with red and black finishes accented with gold leaf. Three exquisitely crafted beds stood in the rear of the cabin, and at the front a table and three chairs of the same quality of workmanship. A senet board and pieces rested on a table, as did a glazed bowl full of dates and an alabaster pitcher and three matching goblets. Father poured wine from the pitcher for each of us.
“Our boat is fit for a Pharaoh,” Mother said.
“No,” Father replied. “Our boat is but a trinket compared to Lord Harenhab’s.”
Could this be? I thought. If I’m surrounded by such grandeur as the betrothed of a Vizier’s son, what will life be like
when I am Queen?
After consuming our wine, Mother and Father sat down to play senet, a game symbolic of the quest for eternal bliss. Both were quite expert at senet, and my talents at it were improving rapidly as I acquired more understanding of the strategy involved in moving the pieces. Occasionally, I would even win. Father invited me to play the victor, but I declined. I wanted instead to see the boat.
I walked outside just as workers were coming on board with our trunks, which they placed in our cabin. A smaller cabin, for the Captain I presumed, was located at the front of the vessel, as were some tables and chairs sheltered by a canopy where people could take meals. A tall mast in the middle of the boat held a furled sail. I walked to the stern and peered over the side at a steering oar held out of the water by a metal hook. A huge eye had been painted on it.
“The eye has magical powers, Tuya. It sees obstacles hidden in the water and keeps us clear of them.”
I turned and saw Addaya.
“I’m admiring your boat,” I told him. “It’s polished and spotless.”
“Befitting the status of dignitaries it’s designed to carry,” he said. “Please let me know if I can be of help to you.”
“I will not hesitate to do so,” I replied.
The Captain left me to attend to his duties, directing his crew as they loaded provisions, stowed gear, adjusted rigging and otherwise prepared for the trip. Before long, he shouted the order to cast off and moments later the boat drifted from the quay. Crewmen hoisted a rectangular sail, which caught a north wind that began pushing us southward. My journey had begun, and while the present destination was Thebes, I knew not where it ultimately would take me.
I sat under the canopy to watch the passing scenery. On the riverbank, farmers tended their fields, for this was perit, the coolest of the three seasons when seed was sewn and carefully cultivated. A huge crocodile slipped into the river to hunt for a meal. Herons and ibises searched the shallows for fish and tadpoles. Men and boys in small boats sought sustenance by casting nets into the water. Occasionally, a finger of the forbidding desert would come all the way to the riverbank as if it were seeking nourishment from the Nile, the source of life and civilization.
Distant pyramids came into view, including one that climbed toward the heavens in six huge steps. I stood in awe, for I had heard of this pyramid and knew it was even older than those of Giza.
Just before darkness fell, the crew lowered the sail and tied the boat to a tree on the bank. I went to bed and slept soundly, the excitement of the day having exhausted me.
Mother, Father and I quickly settled into a daily routine. In the morning, we’d eat a light meal served to us in our cabin. Then we’d play senet or draughts. After that, I’d relax and watch the scenery, or play with the three cats that roamed through the boat keeping it free of vermin.
At midday, the family would take a meal on deck with the Captain, and later Mother and I would talk. She’d tell me how to be a good wife, but she was unable to advise me on how to be a good Queen. As the sun set, my parents and I would drink a goblet of wine or beer and eat some fruit or sweets, then retire to our cabin and fall asleep.
One day, after the morning meal, I approached the Captain who was standing at the bow.
“Do you make the trip to Thebes often?” I asked.
“Yes, and beyond to Aswan at the first cataract. There’s no shortage of Governors, military officers and High Priests who need to make the journey up and down the Nile.”
“My father has been to Thebes. My teacher Maya has been there, too,” I said. “Is it as magnificent as they tell me?”
“More magnificent, I would think. People can talk about Thebes, but words can’t adequately describe it. Thebes is so much more than what most people can see.”
“What do you mean?”
“In Thebes, the veil between the earthly realm and the realms beyond is at its thinnest, enabling people to pass more easily between this world and the worlds of the gods.”
“Have you made the passage?” I asked.
“Yes. At three different times in Thebes I meditated on a statue of Khnum, lord of the Nile, and before long he began dancing in front of me. When the statues of the gods begin to move, you know you have passed into the beyond.”
“That must have been an amusing sight,” I said, laughing at the thought of the ram-headed god dancing.
“Do not mock Khnum,” Addaya cautioned. “He may appear as an ungainly beast, but he’s graceful in his movements. I pray to him every day, and he has never failed to protect me on my journeys.”
“I would never mock Khnum,” I said, justly chastised. “Have you seen other gods move before your eyes?”
“No, but when I’m in Thebes I can feel the Neters all around me, filling me with bliss and delight. I’ve traveled the length of the Nile. In my younger days I even crossed the waters to another land where people built pyramids. Nowhere in my travels have I felt as close to the Neters as I have in Thebes.”
Time passed gently as we sailed up the river, and I looked forward to seeing the great temples and the other sights of Thebes, but as we got closer to the sacred city I found myself growing apprehensive. Before long, I would be a wife and then a mother. At times, thoughts of my new life created joy in me, but at other times they caused trepidation so great I had trouble eating. I tried to live in the present moment as Maya told me to do, but found I could not.
We passed Abydos, where Isis resurrected Osiris, which meant Thebes was within a three days’ journey. Later we came to a bend in the river. The sail was of no use here, so the oarsmen went to work and rowed until dusk.
That evening, well beyond sunset, I found myself wide awake. Covered with a shawl to combat the chill, I sat on deck. The waxing moon was nearly full and cast good light on the river. Lions growled in the distance. The growls, not the cold, caused me to shiver.
The Captain, who was going about his duties making certain the boat was secure, approached.
“Why are you not asleep, Tuya?” he asked.
“I found I was restless, and the prowling lions make me more so.”
“The lions surprise me,” the Captain said. “Rarely are lions heard north of the first cataract any more, but don’t worry about them. They’re near the edge of the desert, and we keep the boat far enough from the shore that animals can’t come on board even if they do venture to the riverbank.”
“Why do we not travel by the light of the moon?” I inquired.
“Sometimes we do when we’re in a great hurry, but my men and I prefer not to. Demons sometimes roam the river at night,” the Captain answered.
“Demons?” I said. “I sense the spirits of the Nile to be gentle and benign.”
“They are, Tuya, but the demons of the desert occasionally come to the river after the sun has set, and they can be as brutal as the sand dwellers as they direct us onto shoals and into the riverbank. It’s best for us to remain still until morning.”
“I’ll be wary of the demons,” I told the Captain.
“Good. It’s the demons, not the lions that should concern you.”
The Captain bid me good night and went to his cabin. I retired to the security and warmth of my own cabin and bed, and the comfort of having my parents near to me.
Deep into the night, however, I sensed the approach of a dark force and my body began to stir. Though not fully awake, I saw a hairy form with sharp teeth and eyes of fire walk through a cabin wall and stand across from me.
A lion? I asked myself as fright filled every corner of my being. No. A demon of the desert for it walks upright like a man. Be gone demon. The spirit of Isis is within me and you can do me no harm.
No sooner had I thought these words than the demon lunged and was upon me. I thrashed beneath it and strove to rise, but its weight and strength were too great. I tried to cry out but sounds would not come forth from my throat.
Isis, drive away this demon. Save me, I pleaded through my thoughts as I struggled
in the darkness.
At first my injunction seemed not to work, but as I kept invoking Isis’ name, a white light grew within me, my thrashing ceased and peace gradually replaced my fear. As it did so, the demon relaxed its grip and dissolved into the night.
I tried to open my eyes, but the encounter had depleted me and I entered into a sleep where vivid images passed through my consciousness. I found myself walking through a narrow stone passageway covered with brightly painted frescoes of the gods and many rooms on both sides of it. In the distance, a withered and bent old man sat on a gilded throne. The darkness of grief surrounded him, but as I approached, the darkness lifted and joy filled his countenance as he gazed upon me.
I wanted to proceed, but my legs became heavy as granite and I could not move. To my amazement, the old man changed into a mummy, crook and flail crossed before him. The mummy vanished and on the throne sat a man shrouded in a mist, also holding a crook and flail. Though he was by no means young, I could see he hadn’t yet been ravaged by the afflictions of those who live to a great age.
Who are you? I asked, but the man did not answer even though he saw me. Who are you? I asked again, but he also disappeared and all became black.
I opened my eyes as Mother pulled back the draperies and light rushed through the cabin windows.
“Good morning, Tuya,” she said. “Did you sleep well?”
“No,” I snapped as I got out of bed and rummaged through my trunk until I found the statue of Sekhmet, which I placed at my bedside. “I now know why the lions growl at the desert’s edge,” I said to Mother. “They’re trying to scare away the demons.”
“Demons?”
“Yes, Mother, demons. Sekhmet, protect us in the nights ahead.”